You often hear about the importance of setting boundaries with other people in your life but how often have you thought about the boundaries we have for ourselves? Maintaining boundaries with yourself is perhaps more important than the boundaries you set with other people. Internal boundaries are especially crucial given our present global situation. You may already have established these internal boundaries with yourself without even realizing it.
Our personal boundaries we set for ourselves are all about holding ourselves accountable for our self-care and happiness. They require self-discipline and healthy management of time, thoughts, emotions, behavior and impulses. Take the time to figure out what’s important to you and think about the things you may need to improve upon.
Internal boundaries often involve making and consistently meeting your goals. I have always struggled with procrastination (my senior superlative was literally “Biggest Procrastinator”). It’s something I really have to be strict with myself on. If I let myself, I could spend all day in bed watching Netflix or scrolling mindlessly through social media. This is an example of when strict internal boundaries are necessary. I make myself set aside time to do my schoolwork without any distractions every day.
Here are some more examples of my internal boundaries I try to maintain regularly:
Setting aside time to be productive every day
Taking a me-break every day to do anything I want
Continuously checking in on how I’m feeling (usually through journaling)
Avoiding toxic people
Honoring my commitments
Meeting my goals consistently
Viewing situations from multiple perspectives
Regularly practicing self-care
Taking time for myself is personally my most important internal boundary. I regularly set aside time that I can use to do anything that will benefit my emotional and mental health. This could be going for a walk when it’s nice out, reading a book, watching a movie, reading my tarot cards, or just taking a nap. During this time I like to check in on myself without dwelling on my current stressors.
With a busy schedule of a college student, sometimes my goals are just not met on a daily basis. It’s important to forgive yourself and try again tomorrow. Internal boundaries can be relaxed and tightened back up when needed. That being said sometimes you have to prioritize what is most important on a given day. Maybe you have a big project due tomorrow and your friends invite you over to watch a movie. You should probably decline their invite even if it would make you happier at the moment, you will be unhappy when grades come out. On the other hand, maybe you have been at the library all day long and are on the edge of burnout, taking a break to have dinner with a friend or taking a bath might be the best thing for you. It’s all about balancing your priorities between work and self and finding what works best for you.
Take your time! Having clear personal boundaries might not come immediately for you. Figure out what you need and want from yourself. You can start small with easier tasks and then work up. Prioritize what is most important, but do not forget to take care of yourself. Self-love is key.
Here’s a free self-care checklist template that you can use to get the ball rolling!
Opmerkingen